Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Question of the Day #119

Margie, one of the original Questions Girls, is coming to LA today. Actually, the first game of questions we ever played was with our Jersey Girl tribe, in her purple bedroom, late at night, sipping some contraband somebody swiped. We scribbled questions on scraps of paper and dumped our deepest secrets out into the candlelight.

I met her when I was 10. I had braces, frizzy hair and desperately needed to wear a bra. She was blonde, tall and lean and she could dance. We'd put on shows for my mom's friends when they had dinner parties. She'd whip around the living room to songs off the Flashdance soundtrack while I belted them out.

When we got to highschool, my braces came off and I learned that the best way to wear curly hair is to let it go its own way. She stood taller, bolder and danced her way through every party in town.

We worked the same shifts at a hair salon, scrubbing heads. Rinsing perms. Washing out color. All the while she watched, picking up tricks and tips.

When our hearts got stomped on, we helped each other pick them up, rearrange the pieces and carefully put them back together.

Whether sneaking out her window late at night, throwing parties when our parents were away or going after the wrong guys, we usually sought out trouble as a team.

And when she became a hair stylist and began working in a NJ salon, I fled to college in Boston. I met new people and learned new things, but always came home for porch talk and late night rounds of questions with the one person who already knew all my answers.

And even though we've lived on opposite coasts for the last 15 years, not much has changed between us. The slightest shift in the way she stands tells me she's upset about something. I immediately know whether or not she likes or dislikes someone upon meeting them. And she can read my mind when I'm pulling my straightest poker face.

We've been through breakdowns, deaths, divorce, illness, and other things I don't dare type out. We don't always agree and sometimes we even fight. But she is a forever friend.

Do you have a forever friend?



  1. Margie's one of mine too, and her sister Christie knows me better than anyone in the world. We too have been thru the tough and awesome times and been separated by 1000 miles but still remain forever friends. :-)

    I think I'm gonna call Christie right now actually!

  2. Sadly, I do not have a best friend. I was a social nerd in high school so I had very few friends. I got hurt a lot so for the longest time, I refused to get close to anyone at all. I still carry a lot of hatred toward the people that hurt me in school even though I know I should let it go.

    I did however recently reunite with an old friend on facebook and we are now emailing regularly. We were pretty close back in the day. :)

  3. I am lucky enough to have more than one forever friend but H is my BFF. We've known each other since we were 14 and been best friends since 18. Even though we live very different lives from each other at this time it's done nothing to weaken our BFFness. I don't expect her to babysit my kids and she's willing to talk to me on the phone with them screaming in the background. Obviously nothing will come between us.

  4. That sounds like an awesome friendship! I do have one! Becky and I grew up in the same neighborhood, went to grade school, high school and college together (we were even roomies for two years). She's still my best friend today!

  5. I feel the same as sudabaki. I feel so lucky that I have more than one forever friend, Suz and LEO, being among them. But sudabaki and I have been through so much together, know EVERYTHING about each other, and know each other's minds, that it's totally not possible for us to not be friends forever. It's a certainty in my life.

  6. Your descrition of Margie brought tears to my eyes. Consider yourself blessed.

  7. Like H & Sudabaki, I too have a few genuine friends that will share my life of them is an amazing writer with a heart of gold and a generous spirit. She sings like a rockstar & cooks like a pro. She has been my partner in crime on waaay too many occasions. I love her dearly & we will rock in unison when the sun starts to set. Another friend entered my life more recently and has blessed it ever since. She truly gets me. We like the same things and pretty much have the same reactions & opinions about almost everything. We have the most fun when we have no plans. She's so beautiful & so smart & I love her dearly. The last one I've known the longest, since high school. We nurture & care for each other, taking turns being mother & child. Our relationship is built on encouragement & love with a true sense of family. We celebrate each other every chance we get. She's loud & crazy and I love her dearly.

    You all know who you are & I love & miss you so much!

  8. I have 3 - we are the girlz. We're as different as could be too!

    The last few years we haven't been able to spend much time together, especially 2008. For Christmas though, I always buy us tickets to see something at the national arts council. We do dinner, then theatre, and often make our way out for apres theatre drinks, chit chat, and laughter. Our time together is always a gift.

    This past Christmas, as we were parting ways after our event, I got weepy. It had been a hard year for me, and it was just so relieving to be with the girlz. I felt so grounded after just one evening with them. I love them immensely.

  9. My forever friends are one of the blessings in my life :). We have been standing up for each other from our childhood days until now. However, we do have some disagreements. After all, we are still our own personalities. It wouldn't be as much as fun... Btw, I got a question for you Suzanne ;p. Have you ever thought about Mr. Linky? I think your daily questions would be an interesting meme. It's just a thought. Best wishes.

  10. Unfortunately, I don't have a forever friend from childhood (too complicated to explain) but I have two from early adulthood. Sadly, my best MF died just a few years ago and I miss him terribly. We shared many things in common, one of which was love of mystery thriller novels. To this day, when I discover a writer I haven't read before and fall in love, I look up and say, "Curt, you would have loved this guy!"

  11. Rosidah, I don't know what Mr. Linky is. Would you please be kind enough to email me at with details? I googled it, but unfortunately, I don't really get it. This Jersey girl can be a tad bit slow... ; )


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