When I logged onto my computer just now, I had seven friend requests on Facebook. Now, I like the idea of connecting. I found my dear friend, Helena, in Sweden. I haven't seen or talked to her in almost 20 years and with just one message, we were 17 and (virtually) Vogue-ing again. Then after being thrilled to find her, I was contacted by an old high school boyfriend who, sometimes, when I think about him, can still make my stomach flip.
But some other friend requests have made me think, "Really? Don't you remember that time you accused me of stealing your boyfriend?" Or "You never talked to me once in high school and you want to buddy up now?"
And then there are the people I don't even know. I know I'm supposed to know them, but I can't figure out who the heck they are. I look them up in yearbooks, study their pictures and still don't recognize them. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings, but the truth is, my memory bank is on overdraft. And that makes me feel crappy.
So I'm torn. How much connection is too much connection?
xoxo,
Suzanne
About Me
- Suzanne Casamento
- Author of Fingerprints, Choosing Tally, and All the Moments in Between. Tweet me @suzannecasamento
My friends and I have had lots of chatter on this subject. I think connection is different for everyone. For me, I only accept or seek out people with whom I've had more than a casual acquaintence. The people I connect with are held high in my esteem and I have a sincere desire to keep in touch. I have no trouble ignoring people I don't know, and those who frankly weird me out.
ReplyDeleteI had this kind of issue back when classmates was new and I signed up for the gold membership. Reconnected with people from elementary, junior high and high school. Only stayed in contact with one of them. A few I don't really remember wanted me to connect them with my brother. I did not go out of my way to do that. I am not in contact with any of them today. It was fun for the brief time it happened. I think that's why class reunions are popular - you connect for one brief moment and then move on with your lives.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I know nothing about facebook, I think connection is great. I know for me that with 3kids and their activities, a husband, a job and all lifes daily tasks...hearing from an old friend brings a smile to my face(even if I haven't spoken to them in 20 years)! It just brings back good memories and makes me appreciate and enjoy today for what it is.
ReplyDeleteI had the same dilemma. I did accept one person who I distinctly remember HATED me in college, so I'm not sure why she now wants to be my "friend." But I figured we're older, we can move beyond the past, and if she wants to get to know me through my Facebook page, okay. We've actually had some fun comments back and forth. I don't think I'm going to drive down and have a spa day with her anytime soon, but it's kind of cool to connect with someone 20 years later and realize they aren't so bad!
ReplyDeleteI am really sick of people nagging me to get on facebook! At least once a day, someone asks or sends an invite to join. If I wanted to know about your life, I'd ask. Right?????
ReplyDeletei wish Shorty would get on Facebook.
ReplyDeleteI usually just say yes to everyone who tries friending me, unless they're like, part of some weird cult or whatever I just can't get behind or blatantly trying to sell me something. That said, I've sent friend requests to people who were acquaintance. Mostly because I'm just curious what's going on with their lives these days.
ReplyDeleteFacebook is rather mystifying when it comes to catching up with ex-girlfriends. The ones I always thought everything was cool with don't want to talk to me. On the other hand, the ones I was sure would run screaming to their psychiatrists at the sight of my name are all to happy to chat/ email/ show off pictures of their kids, etc. Go figure.
ReplyDeleteI just got on Facebook prompted by a high school reunion group forming on it. I found it to be a little juvenile, but it is addictive...It's been fun reconnecting with long lost friends. But I do find it funny when someone from HS you really didn't know "friends" you, I accept because I don't want them to think I"m rude! But if I really have no idea who they are...I ignore the request. Crazy stuff.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is, if one more person throws a sheep at me I'm gonna scream.
ReplyDelete